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- From the column "Road Has a New Hog," by Miami Herald columnist, Dave Barry, Florida’s most popular humorist.
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"In the real world, what people mainly do with their Sport Utility Vehicles, as far as I can tell, is try to maneuver them into and out of parking spaces. I base this statement on my local supermarket, where many of the upscale patrons drive Chevrolet Subdivisions. I've noticed that these people often purchase just a couple of items -- maybe a bottle of diet water and a two-ounce package of low-fat dried carrot shreds -- which they put into the back of their Subdivisions, which have approximately the same cargo capacity, in cubic feet, as Finland. This means there is plenty of room left over back there in case, on the way home, these people decide to pick up something else, such as a herd of bison."
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- Author and Miami Herald columnist Carl Hiaasen discussing his novel, Sick Puppy, a farcical eco-noir romp set in South Florida in which the villain is an SUV-driving litterbug and lobbyist for developers. |
"I just grew up feeling this way. It's not saving a tree for the sake of saving a tree. If you save enough trees, you stop a lot of the graft and criminal behavior going on between politicians. They're selling their vote for what everyone wants -- a piece of the land. For that waterfront or lake front or estuary. What Sick Puppy is about is that they can get it as long as they have these lobbyists. …The thing down in Florida is you can get in your car and drive by the carnage. See the bulldozers fill in the estuary. I just always wanted to put one of these bastards into a book and have terrible things happen to him."
- Florida author, Harry Crews, on his novel Car, in which the protagonist, Harry Mack, attempts to eat a Ford Maverick. Crews teaches literature at the University of Florida.
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"The novel Car would, I think, be a better book if the automobile outraged me less. I hate its stifling presence and abhor the sheer stupidity of the automobile industry. Consider this question: How much sense does it make for a 113-pound housewife to get into 4,000 pounds of machinery to drive 2 blocks for a 13-ounce loaf of bread? That question and others like it made writing the book Car inevitable." |
Florida Car Quotes Page Two
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